elements of argument

Ironically, as a prof who has to teach argumentation now n then, it is interesting to see fallacies and logical problems so rife among people who otherwise seems well-educated and/or rational.

I happen to be a member of a few not-always-well-respected groups (including educators) and am always astonished how insecurities and fear drive knee-jerk responses to them. Im sure a few MSers who happen by this blog might think "uhuh, dyke spic bitch fuck", but think about it: from whence comes the reaction? 'cause I'm not agreeable or accessible to someone?

I live in America. In AZ, where it's legal to carry a concealed weapon without a license. Into bars, even, unless posted. I'm not hugely fond of AZ, but should I choose to carry a gun (and I've even had law enforcement training for the feds), I imagine some people who have knee jerk verbal responses to my existence might be quieter.

But I don't want to carry a concealed weapon. I'd like to hope one day our American brains become as fast as our mouths. We're still reading as a nation at about 8th grade level. Many of us argue like a pingpong game-- back n forth, did not-did too style.

Argument fallacy 101-- Begging the question: treating an opinion that is open to question as if it were already proved or disproved. (thank you, LB Handbook, 11th edition)

Non sequitur: 'it does not follow'-- drawing conclusions from irrelevant evidence (ibid).

Anyway, desire springs eternal for my countrypeople. As does desire for a MS cure. But until then, civil discourse on all sides would be of value.

Health and love to all!

LOLcat for the weekend

Owie Kitteh

Sigh... end of another work week for me, but lots of ancillary stuff. And WHY oh WHY did I think I should use the leg press at the gym? Talk about a booboo.

Oh well. Hopefully Bear can kiss it better. Or alcohol. Yeah, that's it...

The finest in possibly-illegal gimp-cessories part 2

This is my brain WITHOUT drugs
I had this cup made with a single image from my first set of MRIs in December, when they found all the Xmas lites in my head. This one image has always just fascinated me-- perhaps because the lesions are so damn BIG. And interestingly, whoever I show this mug to thinks it's 1- beautiful and 2- "so cool!"

Go figure. They still say that when I tell them it's MY brain. Oh well. Perhaps they are not using that part anyway.

The finest in possibly-illegal gimp-cessories

Mystic 8-ball gimptastic spinner

Well, I'm not sure if a spinner is illegal in AZ (I know they are in about 40 other states if they're after-market), but I really wanted something to help me with big turns in my CripMobile (my Toy Echo), so I figured I'd get a cheap spinner for my steering wheel. Of course, the only one they had at the closest auto store to me was, of course-- an 8-ball. Seen above, it has been a joy, if a little bit ghettofabulous. Of course, I took my Bear's 8-ball valve caps off his wheels and stuck them on mine, then we got an 8-ball shifter knob... and just stopped short of the fuzzy 8-ball danglies for the rear view mirror. Phew!

I am not sure what exactly I will say if I am stopped. I have yet to determine if they are illegal in my present state of residence. I suppose I can show them my id card from Roche that identifies me as a clinical trial participant.. but then again, they'd have to understand that... oh dear!

Either way, I have to say it is a great tool to cut down on the strength I have to use to turn my steering wheel. OK, and it's a bit of the totally cool, too. At least I didn't get the chromed one I found later!

R-E-S-P-O-N-S-I-B-- oh, you get it

you have no idea how much i wish Miss Ree would remake her classic (pace, Otis!) Today was an interesting example of how responsibility has become a dirty word. It's endemic to have excuses for anything short of fessing up with "My bad. I screwed up, and I guess I live with the consequences."

HA! *insert snorty sound here*

No one likes to be wrong, but given I have not taken advantage of my neurological nightmare to justify my screwups, I feel like too much is supposed to be forgiven without reprisals. I want to go somewhere where I can bury my head in books and pretend the world is full of responsible, hardworking people who believe we are all in this together. Kinda like Iowa City, but without the tornados, you know?

Ach. Well, perhaps I will start "coming out" as an MSer and see how it affects people's perception of my responsibility. Maybe I can claim I'm doing it for research, hey? *evil grin*

More health care thoughts, and one cool doc!

If possible, I've totally come to love my MS doc even more than I did before- dig this:
My doc, who for now will remain nameless, already had my admiration by having a MD and a PhD-- hell, I only have one, and it was the "easy" one (PhD). While farting around online looking for pics of my doc's hospital, I googled his name and clicked on "Images", and lo and behold-- he has an Olympic medal!

Turns out he was on Italy's 1992 bronze medal winning pentathlon team in Barcelona. In the individual pentathlon, he came in 5th in the world. I mean, what can't he do??! Besides, well, so far cure MS. Sigh. And he's quite nice andd approachable, too. Perfecto!

Anyway, the snarky part of the post is how screwed up the healthcare reform movement has become. While I knew it would not be easy, I didn't know or think it would devolve into even worse bitch slapping than the last go-round. I think the pres has shown himself to waffle a bit, and has allowed what I do believe to be a haphazard opposition to coalesce and make noise. I think the misinformation is bullshit and I believe that change must occur. it has to, for us to move forward in the country toward a greatness we have lost much of. Nothing, no health care system is all perfect, but I wish we could get our heads out of our asses and see that we're a bit broken healthcare-wise, and will keep getting broken. Why do we fear so much not just change, but investigation of our history and errors? What the hell is so scary? It's not like the Cubans are gonna invade with universal healthcare.

What bothers me a lot is just that-- we're ignorant sonsabitches, god love us, and sometimes we have a real hard time admitting we aren't number one all the time. I mean, just look at thhe upcoming world cup! The world don't revolve around us solely anymore-- and seems trying to cope with healthcare reform could help us really change so that we understand we're a global community, in a literal sense. Why not admit medicine is broken, at least a lot of the administrative side, and work on it with sleeves rolled up? That is, after all, the American way.

Once more with ganas...

...first off, it's not yet easy to post with a tiny keyboard! But the cost of technology is high.

Lately I've been having more and more thoughts about not mortality, so much, as aging and wondering what exactly happened between 2004 and now. While this year has been a pain in the ass, brain, and legs, it's also been one of those classically thought-inducing periods of life where you reevaluate. But I think what it's resulted in is a lot of confusion about not only what I'm doing, but also why I'm doing so much of it in the same way.

I had a chat with Bear last afternoon about how I feel sometimes like my life is still not quite age-appropriate, that there's a lot of growing up in practical ways that I feel I need to do. It's hard to look at 39 on its way without wondering how I got here in one piece, and also to look at why it's so hard to make some changes and stop bitching about life being annoying. The number of years these last months have put on me since Jan 13th or so is really only now becoming clear. I don't think I've had any globally Zen revelations, but I've realized some real limitations. So long as the MS wasn't really bothering me much, which it hasn't for a while, I think I could kind of consider it a lesser-relative of Victorian swooning-- a kind of romantically stoic thing which really didn't matter because my brain is functioning relatively well (more about that later).

However, especially recently, it's become clear that there is zilch romanticism in the on-off use of a cane, of a crip parking tag, or of MRIs of holes in my head put there by something no one can cure yet. I mean, I like being different, but recurring vertigo and accompanying unsteadiness which brought out my cane after 2.5 months thanks to MS isn't anything "different" that is good for me. I have a really hard time remembering that there's no cure, and each drug works differently, and damn it, I can't predict it. I also have an impossibly hard time not just shouldering through life and insisting at all turns that "I'm fine." I never realized until now that I do actually need someone to lean on, that well-- once again, health and life shows me I just can't do it all all of the time. As a few people recall, admitting that isn't just scary, it's psychologically a real problem for me. It's probably not the disaster it was at Iowa, but still-- once more, I should find a decent shrink and try to articulate being both hypercompetent and really uncertain and scared.

See, the issue might be that I know too much but just don't know enough, and I hate ignorance in myself. It makes me a good and voracious researcher, which won't make me any money but makes me happy. While I am not worried now about my brain abandoning me, I find myself forced to think about a future where not knowing isn't curable-- no matter how many king's men and horses work on the problem. I guess maybe I'm tired of terminal "I'm fine"-ness. Either it gets okay, or the uncertainty grows before I have time to figure out how to deal.

Either way-- there's not much likelihood now of me checking out early, and karma may doom me to a long life-- and one most interesting and hard indeed. Wouldn't be my life if it weren't, I guess. Must be a lot of fun and contentment in a dull, average, placid life. Who knew I might want that one day?